10 Ways to Get Past the First Date

BEFORE YOUR DATE:


1. Get ready (dress up) Show that you’re anticipating your first date in your clothing. Buy a new shirt off the mannequin – and if she brings it up, you can tell her about the mannequin, or how it makes you uncomfortable, but it was fun to think of her when you got it.
2. Smell good (but not too much) Hopefully this is self-explanatory for most, but shower before your date, wear deodorant, and ONE spray of cologne under your shirt – just enough for her to notice a new smell when she comes in close!

ON YOUR DATE:


1. Show you’re on the rise If there is an opportunity, briefly mention where you plan to be with your career, or education in 5 years. Tell her briefly about your aspirations, and ask her about hers.
2. Be attentive to her and others Whenever she says something think “…begs the question” – as in what question does her last comment beg? Is there anything else about what she said that she didn’t include right out of the gate? Ask at least one follow up question whenever she brings up a new topic!
3. Confident, but not cocky Just stay out of the fringes with confidence. You don’t have to be a Casanova, but if you’re feeling awkward try and imagine yourself looking back on this first date and reminiscing about it. Also try and have candy or mints or gum or a small snack to break out and nibble on – this tricks your brain into feeling comfortable because we tend to associate eating with comfort. On the other end, avoid being cocky at all on your first date – this should be all about her if you’re going to want to go on another date with her.
4. Find shared interests/connections Try and find a shared connection, even if it’s super common. Ask her about movies from your childhood, and ask her about movies from her childhood. Ask about mundane situations around childhood such as first best friends, school lunch, favorite playground features, Fourth grade teachers, or any other simple experiences from childhood that might be common between you. Once you find one, and hopefully laugh about it, she’ll associate you with that (hopefully fond) memory.
5. Make it fun Whatever you do – try and find something spontaneous to add a little fun to your date, for example if waiting for a movie instead of just sitting in the theater, go on a quick walk and pretend to dance with her and give her a twirl, or stop at a playground before dinner and go on the swings, or at mini-golf challenge her to use the golf club like a pool cue on one hole. Just find a different way of doing what you are doing. This will help you stand out and stick in her memory.
6. Make her laugh Do something silly, or laugh at your own hubris. Find some way to insert humor into the first date, even if it’s at the expense of first dates in general! First dates are the WORST! Haha.
7. Leave her curious If she is interested in something about you, offer to finish the story on the next date, or offer to show her where something happened in your childhood on your next date, or offer to bring her something interesting on your next date related to your conversation. Don’t over promise, but if you can think of a way to make her curious, it will be a surefire way to get past the first date.
8. Ask for a second date Why not ask for a second date? Find a moment when things are going well, and point it out – “I’m having a lot of fun, we should do this again soon!” or mention something specific to look forward to – “I’ve been meaning to go see that new movie sometime, would you like to go see it with me this weekend?”

Luvidya can help you make your dating experience more successful! Book an appointment today OR Call Luvidya directly at 415-322-9293!